Please enjoy this guest post, unintentionally submitted via email by my delightful friend Claire:

“So I normally drive through a McDonalds close to my work on the days when I work to pick up coffee. And I usually pay with a credit card. And I usually spaz a little right before I get to the first window because the guy who works the drive through is really attractive. And everytime I leave I think, “Claire, stop being an idiot, that boy sees seven hundred people a day, he does not register who you are or care about the music that is playing in your car or think about your hair/dress/necklace decisions.” 

So this morning I’m getting my coffee, but I had taken my credit card out of my wallet on my trip this weekend. So I handed Cute Drive Thru Boy a 5. And he was like, “Wow, cash today?” And I totally flipped out inside like a 12 year old at a Justin Biebur concert: “OHMYGODheknowswhoiam????” And then I said something so lame it does not merit repeating here. And then, to my HORROR, he didn’t hear me and I had to repeat the incredibly lame thing I said, only doubling it’s anti-climacticness. 

So now he knows me. And knows I’m lame. 

I need to find a new McDonalds.”